Comfort and Joy Read online

  He put a Marvin Gaye record on the turntable in the corner, and then I took the hand he offered me and let him draw me into his arms. “I don’t have any music from this century,” he said, “but even if I did, it wouldn’t be the stuff they play in clubs.”

  “This is so much better.” He slid an arm around my waist and held my hand in his, and as we began to move to the music I said, “Thanks for humoring me.”

  “What makes you think I’m humoring you?”

  “Because you’re slow dancing in your living room in the middle of the night.”

  “I’m doing this for me, every bit as much as I’m doing it for you.”

  The alcohol was making me feel warm and just a little dizzy. I found myself telling him, “You’re really cute.”

  “So are you.”

  “You don’t have to say that, just because I did.”

  “I said it because it’s true.” I searched his dark eyes looking for a punchline, but I didn’t find one.

  We danced through the entire A-side of the album. It was the most romantic thing I’d ever experienced, but I didn’t tell him that. Instead, I just rested my head on his shoulder and enjoyed how great he felt in my arms.

  When the record ended, we returned to the couch and I sat right beside him. He draped the comforter over both of us and put his arm around my shoulders, and I leaned against him. After a few moments, I said, “I also assumed I’d be having loads of sex once I moved out. Like, so much.”

  “How’d that work out?”

  “It didn’t.”

  “You don’t mean you’re a virgin, do you?”

  “Not…entirely. I had a few dates in college and grad school, and some of them ended up in the bedroom where, you know. Some stuff was done.” Oh man. The alcohol had definitely hampered my ability to shut up.

  He asked, “Did that stuff include sex?”

  “Kind of?”

  “Why was that in the form of a question?”

  “There was definitely oral sex. Then there were attempts at some other stuff, and…how did we get on this subject?”

  “You were telling me all the things you wanted to do when you finally moved out on your own.”

  “Oh, that’s right. Wow, I’m really talking a lot. I usually don’t. In fact, people love telling me I’m too quiet. Not right now, though. I just keep talking, and talking, and talking.”

  He grinned and said, “You’re totally smashed.”

  “Yeah, it doesn’t take much. But I’m also rambling because you make me nervous.”

  “Do I? I don’t mean to.”

  “I know. It’s because you’re unreasonably gorgeous. Like, seriously. You’re so pretty that I just want to lick you.”

  He grinned and told me, “You’re going to hate yourself in the morning when you remember this conversation.”

  “I really am, but at the moment, I don’t care. I just want to tell you you’re beautiful, because you are, and because people probably don’t tell you that enough.”

  Dakota’s grin turned into a smile, and then he got up and held a hand out to me. When I let him pull me to my feet, he said, “You should try to sleep it off. Take my bed, and I’ll take the couch.”

  “Please come to bed with me.”

  “We can’t have sex, Jed. Not when you’ve been drinking.”

  “I know. I just really want to sleep beside you.” Ugh, that sounded so needy.

  “Okay, we can do that.”

  He handed me the blanket and put two more logs on the fire, and I followed him into the bedroom. We curled up facing each other, and I said, “Thank you for everything tonight. This ended up being one of the best nights I’ve had in a very long time.”

  “I enjoyed it, too.” I hoped he wasn’t just saying that to be nice.

  Chapter 2

  I’d actually slept. That was surprising not only because of my insomnia, but because I could never fall asleep in unfamiliar places. Somehow, I’d even managed to sleep in.

  I sat up in that comfortable bed and stretched my arms over my head as I looked around. The room was warm, and a fire was burning brightly in the hearth. I could hear Dakota doing something in the kitchen as I rolled out of bed and went into the bathroom.

  After using the facilities, I put on my glasses and studied myself in the small mirror over the sink. I’d definitely looked better. My blue eyes were bloodshot, and my hair was sticking up at a weird angle. I tried to fix my hair by getting it wet and tamping it down, but that just left it soggy and misshapen.

  It was a lost cause, so I gave up and joined Dakota, who was still dressed in sweat pants and that form-fitting thermal Henley. I had to tear my gaze away from his big arms and shoulders as he smiled at me and said, “Good morning. I hope you like French toast.”

  “I love it.”

  “Excellent. Breakfast will be ready in just a few minutes. In the meantime, help yourself to some coffee.”

  While he dipped thick slices of bread into an egg mixture and lined them up on a griddle, I circled the counter and picked up a mug. Then I turned to him and said, “I’m sorry about last night.”

  He glanced at me and asked, “Why are you apologizing?”

  “Because I got totally plowed on one cocktail and some spiked cocoa, rambled on about God knows what, and somehow invited myself into your bed.”

  “You don’t have to apologize for any of that.”

  “Sure I do. I was a terrible houseguest, and I’ll call my brother right after we eat and get out of your way.”

  “That’s not going to happen,” he said. “Jessie called about an hour ago, and he and I both agreed you’re not going anywhere.”

  “What do you mean?”

  “Look outside.”

  I crossed the living room, and when I stepped out onto the covered porch, I murmured, “Oh wow.”

  The entire landscape was frozen and starkly beautiful. The trees actually looked like they were sugar-coated, and a thick fog hung in the air. In a matter of seconds, I started shivering, so I hurried back inside and stood in front of the fireplace as Dakota told me, “All the roads in the area are solid sheets of ice, so driving anywhere is pretty hazardous right now.”

  “I’m so sorry. Now you’re totally stuck with me.”

  “Good.”

  When I glanced at him, he flashed me a bright smile. “I like your company, Jed, and from a purely selfish perspective, I’m thrilled not to be stuck in my cabin all alone. I do feel bad that it’s throwing a wrench in your holiday plans, though.” He seemed sincere about wanting me there, which was good, because there really wasn’t anything I could do about it.

  I joined him on the barstools in front of the counter, and as we ate breakfast, he told me, “I washed your clothes, so you don’t have to hang out in pajamas all day. They’re in the dryer.”

  “Thanks for doing that.”

  “No problem.”

  After a minute, I asked, “Do you think there’s any way to get to my rental car? I really need my laptop and briefcase.”

  “For what?”

  “I’d planned to get a lot of work done this weekend.”

  He said, “There’s no internet here at the cabin.”

  “I downloaded everything I needed before I left the office. I have several reports to write and wasn’t sure if the lodge’s internet would be reliable.”

  “Maybe it’s not the worst thing that you’re stuck here. You’re on vacation and should be relaxing.”

  “That’s not an option. Like I said, I’ve only been at my job six months, and I have a lot to prove.” Dakota was staring at me, so I said, “What?”

  “You’re a total workaholic.”

  “Look who’s talking with your ninety-hour work week.”

  “I don’t have a choice, since I can’t afford employees.”

  “But you own the place,” I said, “so you could probably come up with a better schedule than eleven a.m. to two a.m. I bet there are blocks of time where you’re paying
more for heating and electricity than you’re making in sales. In fact, it’s entirely possible that you could be open less and actually make more money, which is why you should really let me do a comprehensive analysis of your business.”

  He frowned and asked, “How did this become about me? We were talking about the fact that you’re on vacation and should be enjoying your time off.”

  “Technically, I didn’t take any time off. The office is closed Monday through Wednesday for the holidays, and I’m planning to be back at my desk bright and early Thursday morning.”

  His frown deepened. “You mean you’re planning to drive back to the city on Wednesday?”

  “Yeah. What’s wrong with that?”

  “It’s Christmas Day.”

  “I know, and I’m planning to spend the day with my brother and his family. Then after dinner, I’m going to drive back to San Francisco.” He was still frowning, so I said, “It’s a perfectly good plan.”

  “Would it have been so terrible to take Thursday and Friday off? I bet most of your coworkers are doing that.”

  “They are, so it’s the perfect opportunity to get a lot of work done without any distractions.” I chewed my lower lip for a few moments before saying, “There must be some way to get to the SUV. What did you do the last time it got icy up here?”

  “I stayed home.”

  “Really?”

  “Yes, really. I’ve gotten used to driving in snow, but ice is another thing entirely.”

  I asked, “But what if it was an emergency, and you had to go somewhere?”

  “Well, in an emergency I normally would have given my truck and its tire chains a shot, but it’s dead. If I really had to get out of here, I could also try hiking out with a pair of metal ice cleats, but that’s a one-way trip.”

  “Why would it be one-way?”

  “You saw for yourself how steep that last hill is. You could probably get to the SUV fairly easily. Hell, you could even sled down to it, not that I’d recommend it because you’d gain a lot of speed on the ice and would probably have to crash into something to stop. But you’d never make it back up the incline, even with cleats.”

  “There must be a solution,” I insisted. “If we put our heads together, I’m sure we can come up with a way to retrieve that laptop and briefcase.”

  “Yeah, but let’s not. At most, you’re going to be stuck here for a day or two, and you were already planning to spend the next few days relaxing at the lodge with your family.”

  “Actually, I was planning to work today and tomorrow.”

  “Then why didn’t you just stay in San Francisco this weekend?”

  “My original plan was to drive up here on Christmas Eve, but Jessie guilted me into coming up sooner. I explained to him that I’d still have work to do, though.”

  “But now all you have to do is hang out with me.”

  “It looks that way.” I was already thinking about when I’d find the time to get those reports done.

  “We’ll work on the enthusiasm thing,” he teased, as he headed into the other room. “I’m going to take a shower, and you might want to call your brother back.”

  When Dakota closed the bedroom door behind him, I leaned on the counter and dialed Jessie’s number. He answered on the second ring with, “Jed?”

  “Hey. I heard you called.”

  “That guy said you were sleeping in. You never actually do that, so are you feeling alright?”

  “Yeah, I feel fine.”

  “Okay good. So, tell me about the person you’re staying with,” he said. “What’s he like?”

  “He’s kind, and fun, and since he’s in the other room, I can also tell you that he’s smoking hot, gay, and single.”

  “Wait, do you like him?”

  That made me laugh. “What kind of question is that? It sounds like we’re back in high school.”

  “Whatever. Do you?”

  “I’m attracted to him, but nothing’s going to happen.”

  “Why not? You’re both gay and single, and you’re stuck in a cabin because the entire mountain has turned into one giant Otter Pop. That seems like a perfect recipe for romance.”

  “I’m an awkward dork, Jessie, and there’s no way he would want me. I’ve done nothing but embarrass myself, literally from the moment we met. When I flagged down his truck, I was only wearing a pair of briefs.”

  “Um, duh, he’s gay and you’re cute. He probably loved finding you in your underwear!”

  “Maybe if I hadn’t been dancing around like Rumpelstiltskin while covered in goosebumps.”

  Jessie chuckled and asked, “Is Rumpelstiltskin known for his sick dance moves?”

  “I thought he danced a little jig or something, but that’s not the point. I was ridiculous when we met, and it just got worse from there. At one point, I slid down a hill on my belly, like a seal.”

  “Why did you do that?”

  “Not on purpose! Later on, I got drunk on spiked cocoa and a single cocktail and rambled on and on about how inexperienced I am. Also, I keep trying to tell him what to do with his business, which has to be getting on his last nerve.”

  “Well, stop that,” he said.

  “I’d love to! It’s not like I’m trying to be totally unappealing on purpose, but this crap just keeps spilling out. I bet he’s thrilled to be stuck here with me.”

  “You know, when I was talking to him earlier, he was actually singing your praises.”

  “What did he say?”

  “Something along the lines of being glad for your company, because you’re an amazing guy.”

  I asked, “Did he actually say ‘amazing’? Because that’s a word you use all the time, but I can’t imagine a tattooed bartender saying it. Then again, maybe I’m stereotyping.”

  “I’m paraphrasing. I definitely think he likes you though, so just relax and have fun. Do you have condoms with you?”

  “Oh my God, Jessie!”

  “Is that a no?”

  I sighed and told him, “I actually don’t have anything with me, because my suitcase rolled down the hill when I did my seal impersonation. In fact, I don’t even have a toothbrush. Not that I’d packed condoms anyway, because why would I?”

  “Oh no! I hope he has some rubbers. Otherwise, I’m going to need to arrange some sort of flyover, you know like in those movies where a plane drops a bundle of supplies into the wilderness?”

  “I could actually picture you doing that,” I said. “It’s not necessary though, because this isn’t a porno movie. Just because we’re stuck in a cabin doesn’t mean it’s going to turn into some big sex fest.”

  “Why not?”

  “Have you met me?”

  “You always sell yourself short,” he said. “I really think that guy’s into you, and you’re clearly into him, so what’s the harm in having a little fun? Assuming you have protection, obviously. If you don’t, there are still plenty of ways to enjoy naked time, which don’t involve sticking—”

  “Oh my God, please stop talking.”

  “You know, I think I can actually hear you blushing. You should really loosen up, Jed. I have to go help Kai because both our kids have developed instant cabin fever, but I’ll talk to you soon. Now, go bone that guy.”

  Once we disconnected, I muttered, “Good lord.”

  “Is everything alright?”

  That made me jump, since I hadn’t heard Dakota open the bedroom door. “Yeah, it’s fine. I just got off the phone with Jessie, and he—well, let’s just say, I never quite know what’s going to come out of his mouth.” I tried to be subtle as I ran my gaze down his body. He was wearing another skin-tight Henley, dark blue this time, and a well-worn pair of jeans. How could anyone be that effortlessly sexy?

  “He seemed like a fun person when I was talking to him earlier.”

  “Oh, he is. In fact, he’s effervescent. He and I couldn’t be more different.”

  “Doesn’t that mean, like, carbonated?”

  I said
, “It also means vivacious.”

  “So, you don’t think you’re effervescent?”

  “Uh, no.”

  “Then how would you describe yourself?”

  “I don’t know, stoic?” I looked around and asked, “Do you think my clothes are dry?”

  “Probably.” He opened a door to the left of the fridge, revealing a small laundry room with crowded shelves and avocado green appliances. Then he grabbed the dryer’s contents and deposited them in my arms.

  He’d washed everything together, from my jeans and briefs to my coat and mittens. That made me twitchy, because that wasn’t how you were supposed to do it. But I just said thank you, and as I carried my clothes to the bedroom, I reminded myself it had been nice of him to even think of doing my laundry. There was no need to get uptight about it.

  Once I was dressed, I returned to the kitchen and asked, “So, what should we do?”

  He looked up from a yellow legal pad and put his pencil down as he said, “I was just making a list of every single thing I could think of to do in this cabin. Can you think of anything to add?”

  I picked up the notepad and scanned the list. His handwriting was bold and messy, which seemed appropriate. He’d written: cook, bake something, make a fort, play board games, get super drunk, play the guitar, read magazines, make paper airplanes, fuck, decorate for Christmas, tell ghost stories. I was sure he was kidding about half the items on that list, including the part about having sex. He said, “Oh wait, I just thought of one more.”

  He scrawled, ‘play the deadliest can game’ at the bottom of the list, and I asked, “What’s that?”

  “I’ve been meaning to clean out the pantry ever since I moved in three years ago. I’m pretty sure there’s stuff older than me in there, and we could have a contest. Whoever finds the most horrifying expiration date wins.” I wrinkled my nose, and he said, “Okay, so we’ll save that one for when we’re really hard up for entertainment.”

  I asked, “If I wasn’t here, what would you be doing?”

  “Eating, sleeping, or working out. But I’m sure we can come up with something better.”

  “How do you work out in here?”

  “There are weights, an exercise bike, and some other stuff on the sun porch. It’s freezing-ass cold this time of year, but that’s good motivation to work up a sweat quickly and get the hell out of there.”